For some people who are in my everyday life, they know that this past year has been one of great challenge and great change.  Without being able to fully articulate January through September, :), I found this song on Sara Groves’ website just now (I’m pretty pumped that my friend, Ben, is playing guitar for her current tour and I keep hoping she randomly schedules a concert somewhere near here so I can go!).  This is a great explanation of me right now:

Just Showed Up

by Sara Groves and Joel Hanson

Spending my time sleep walking
Moving my mouth but not saying a thing
Hoping the changes would take by working their way from the outside in
I was in love with an idea
Preoccupied with how a life should appear
Spending my time at the surface repairing the holes in the shiny veneer

There are so many ways to hide
There are so many ways not to feel
There are so many ways to deny what is real

And I just showed up for my own life
And I’m standing here taking it in and it sure looks bright

I’m going to live my life inspired
Look for the holy in the common place
Open the windows and feel all that’s honest and real until I’m truly amazed
I’m going to feel all my emotions
I’m going to look you in the eyes
I’m going to listen and hear until it’s finally clear and it changes our lives

There are so many ways to hide
There are so many ways not to feel
There are so many ways to deny what is real

And I just showed up for my own life
And I’m standing here taking it in and it sure looks bright

Oh the glory of God is man fully alive
Oh the glory of God is man fully alive

There are so many ways to hide
There are so many ways not to feel
There are so many ways to deny what is real

And I just showed up for my own life
And I’m standing here taking it in and it sure looks bright

I haven’t even heard the song, but the words are extemely powerful to me in this moment.  Maintaining what I’ve gained, in finally showing up for my own life is not as easy as I had hoped it would be.  It holds great challenges to overcome but I walk knowing that God is so pleased that I’ve join Him on a deeper level-as He has always been there for my life.

"Oh the glory of God is man fully alive"-that makes me think of my pastor’s current series, Neos.  This past week his sermon was Feast or Famine, and he talked about feeding that sinful part of us vs. feasting on God and developing a strong spiritual appetite.  To be fully alive is to be feasting on all that God has for us…and that is the glory of God.