Let Go

Dewayne_woods Ladies and Gentlemen, I have recently stumbled upon an amazing gospel singer named DeWayne Woods.  You’ve gotta check this guy out!  I referenced him a couple weeks ago when I talked about a song that kept coming across my path, "Let Go."  After searching for awhile, I ended up finding him on myspace.  The song that led me to this guy was that one song though, "Let Go."  It goes something like this:

…as soon as I stop worryin’, worryin’ how the story ends, when I let go and I let God, let God have His way…that’s when things start happenin’…when I stop lookin’ at back when…when I let go and I let God have His way…

Awesome stuff.  I am constantly looking at my story and wondering how this next chapter is going to look.  After all, I’m the type of person who regularly enjoys reading the beginning of a story and then the end of a story, only to go back and read the middle later.  I’m well aware of my final end, once I reach eternity.  I’m as aware as the Bible helps me to be anyway.  But there are always going to be several subplots to the stories of our lives.  The current story…not so sure how it’s going to end and I wonder about it a lot.  This song speaks to my heart about letting go, very well.  I have played it often these last couple of weeks, and it has served as a reminder to pray  🙂

Be encouraged to do the same.  Let go and let God…it’s a common phrase, but fitting words for any life.

Thankful

This fourth week of November brings us all to a place where we are encouraged to think more about what we’re thankful for.  It’s one of those things that you either don’t know where to begin or you don’t know where to end.  This week I’d like to just keep posting what I’m thankful for…in no particular order:)  To be honest, this is more for me than for anybody else.  It’s just good to remember…

I’m thankful:

-that I grew up in church

for change in my life

-that God gives me grace beyond what I clearly deserve

-that I am working at a school where I am appreciated

-that this year has brought me the coolest group of students to work with

-that I am from a cool place like Philly

-for a family that loves me more today than they ever did

-for my mom who is the BEST customer service representative at Cardone Industries (buy Cardone car parts!), winning 3 out of 5 awards at this year’s banquet

-for my dad who always draws Robbie the cat stamps on every envelope he gives me-and my biggest fan

-for my brother Todd who has always made me laugh

-for my sister-in-law Tiffany who giggles w/ me about silly things

-for my brother Dave who (finally 🙂 occasionally calls me out the blue to say Hi and who has committed to watching all of 24.Season 3 with me this week

-for my sister-in-law Stephanie, who has become one of my best friends and one of my favorite people to talk with

-for my nephew Robert who, at the age of 11, still gets so excited to see his Mim!

-for my nephew Ross who gets super sentimental when I leave him and makes me laugh when I come

-for my nephew Ryder who I’ve only met once-who I can’t wait to hold in 24 hours!

-for Jessica who lives far away but still sends me pictures of her and her family in the mail

-for Jen (Gowell) who has been my best friend since I was 8; my former roommate; my oldest friend

-for my roommate, Jennifer, who stays up late with me all the time to just hang out and who vaccuums @ 10.30pm and can’t seem to figure out how to work my TV/VCR

-for pigs (hah!)

-for Carrie who keeps me accountable for my thoughts and who makes me laugh a whole lot

-for Eddie and JT who really care when they ask me how I’m doing

-for Nicki-my mentor and friend-who keeps me accountable and whose life of integrity causes me to be grossly real with her

-for Chris for sharing Nicki with me;)

-for Brad who not only challenges me every time he preaches, but who introduces me to the funniest and weirdest websites ever…and he introduced me to blogging

-for Katie who is real with me and whose book I will someday own:)

-for Phil who thinks just like me!

-for Emily who has been moving through this season of her life with grace

-for a Peppermint Mocha from Starbucks (or a Mint Condition from Caribou)

-for Jamie who I love to worship with

-for Tal and Gwen who are my favorite example of what a couple should be

-for www.maps.google.com

-for King who lives in China but who still seems to impact my life on a regular basis

-for Richie and Michele who have shown me true friendship through their consistency

-for Church of the King-a body of people who want to see Metro Detroit filled with church plants

-for having the privilege of leading New Life Ministries-the best ministry ever!

-for my crockpot

for hoodie sweatshirts

-for the opportunity to go to North Central-some life-changing years

-for Jeremy Camp‘s music

-for life!  it’s so amazing!

****This list is far from finished…I just need to go to bed, for tomorrow I drive to Chicago!

I’m not crazy, I just don’t want to fail again!

That was one of the closing lines of Grey’s Anatomy tonight.  A girl, a patient, stuck her hand on the stove burner to hopefully burn herself enough so that she wouldn’t have to take the Bar exam later that week.  Throughout the show we figured that that was the case, but she lied to the doctors the whole time until one of them questioned her about it.  She told them that there was a lot of pressure on her to pass this test and she’d already failed it 5 times.  They ended up taking her up to the psych ward to receive some help for a little while.  She resisted, saying, "I’m not crazy, I just don’t want to fail again!" 

Nobody wants to fail.  Nobody strives to fail.  People try to keep from failing most of the time!  Yet all of us at one time, and then another, fail.  Because I tend to fail, over and over again, there are times that I feel like I’m going crazy (not in the literal sense, but you know that feeling).  There’s pressure, and it’s not even usually from others.  It usually comes as a result of the expectations that I perceive others have of me.  It mainly comes as a result of sin…

Sin is so frustrating and someday I’m going to be through with it.  That’s one thing I can’t wait for when I get to Heaven.  And at the same time, I don’t have to fear failure as I do sometimes.  This is something that I recently realized I need to maintain-getting rid of my fear of failure.  I fear failing God, my family, my friends, my ministry, my students, myself…It doesn’t consume me, but if not kept in check, this fear of failure could start to make me think I’m going crazy.

I thank God that He is helping me to remember that I need to dispel the fears that I experience and accept his overwhelming grace.